Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Another 3

We're going out tonight
Dressed up in black and white

Today's blog is brought to you by small positive numbers.  I ran 3 miles today in twenty-four minutes.  That's two four.  Which is how you order a case of beer at The Beer Store (yep, that's the name) in Canada.  "I'll have a two four."  But before you get clever, you can't do it for a 12-pack.  If you ask for a one two, they'll look at you like you're crazy.  Or like you asked for Tecate.  They have Tee-Kate, but they certainly don't know what you are saying if you ask for Tecate. 

You might say that I ran 3 eight minute miles, but you would be wrong.  I learned today that it is possible to go out too fast, even on a short run.  My first mile was fast - but my last one was slow.  The last one felt kind of like mile 12 of a half marathon.  Running, but moving slower than people who are walking.

Happy Halloween. 

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Just Like A Wavin' Flag

Put me in a special school
’Cause I am such a fool
And I don’t need a single book
To teach me how to read

3 miles today - at a decent pace.  A wise man (OK - it was Ran Dumb Thoughts) told me that 20 miles per week was the magic number.  I can dig it.  For me, I will try for 4 x 3 during the week and then 6 on the weekend.  Oh yeah, and then round up.  Whatever - it's my new plan.  And it started today perfectly.

My run was through the neighborhood again today and instead of being distracted by the Halloween decorations, I focused on the number of flags being flown.  Nope - not patriotic Americans getting ready for the election.  College football fans.  OK - if you want to fly a flag for your team - whatever, knock yourself out.  But here's the thing - you really can't fly two flags.  A&M and Texas.  LSU and A&M.  Texas Tech and LSU.  I saw all these combinations and more.  Look - if you think that you are supporting two teams, you aren't - you are supporting none.  I get it, I've been conflicted before, but I pick a side - as much as I love our Northern neighbors, I always root for the US against Canada.  Except in curling.

Monday, October 29, 2012

I stole my personality

From an anonymous source
And I'm getting paid for it, too
I don't feel bad about that
 - Hockey, Song Away

Yes I stole this great song from Bad Haircut.  It is a good one.  I did 4.5 on the mountain today, and ran a lot of it.  Great workout, but it was warm even at 9am.  I left a part of me on the mountain this morning. 

Sunday, October 28, 2012


I'm leavin
On a jet plane

This is gonna be a busy week for me so not sure what running will look like. Today I took fat dog and we ran one and walked one at around 1230, which was fine for both of us. I then had fried chicken for dinner at one of my fav places and bf even made me feel better about it by having grilled cheese sliders.


I belong with you, you belong with me
-The Lumineers

I ran 5 miles today and again felt better at the end than the beginning.  Maybe running really is good for you.  Long sleeves today - it was great.

On the  run today, I saw lots and lots of Halloween decorations.  People going all out.  There are several houses where they have hung great quantities of those plastic pumpkins (the kind you would take trick-or-treating) in their front yard tree.  A couple of the houses had to have between 50 and 100.  I had an interesting conversation with Great Expectations about this.

GE:  Those look pretty cool
Me:  They remind me of lumineers
GE:  The band?
Me:  No, those paper bags with candles
GE:  Those are luminarias
Me:  Then what's a lumineer?
GE:  Still, just a band

OK.  Fair enough.  More interesting than my inability to know the difference between a pumpkin with no candle, a bag with a candle, and a folk band - is the question of what these people do with their pumpkins the other 11 months.  Do they just throw them away?  Do they have storage space for 100 pumpkins that don't nest or stack?   

Friday, October 26, 2012

Maybe today

We can put the past away.

I had quite a good run up the mountain today. I ran further than I ever have before on the way up. I walked a lot of the way down due to stomach discomfort. This is why fiber makes me sad.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

fat girl/skinny girl

Today I worked a benefits fair, which involves about ten biddies sitting behind tables with fancy table cloths and stacks of colorful give-away pens, first aid kits and keychain flashlights.  After lunch, the host biddy walked around with a plate of cookies and everyone took one.  About an hour later, I heard the following conversation: 

fat girl:  Hey, eat that cookie!  Why didn't you eat that cookie?  I can't believe it's still sitting there.
skinny girl:  Oh, I've been so busy getting this work done!
fat girl:  I can't believe it's still sitting there!  That's why you're skinny and I'm not.
(awkward silence)
fat girl:  Hey!  Look at this, her cookie is still sitting there. I told her to eat that cookie!
biddy:  Huh, yeah
fat girl:  Can you believe that?  I told her that's why she's skinny and I'm not
skinny girl:  No!  No!  I eat Taco Bell at least 3 times a week, every week!
biddy:  Don't you love their crunchy tacos?
fat girl:  Yeah, but I have to eat at least 3 of them
skinny girl:  Yeah!  There's no point in one or two, it takes at least three to fill up!

I was scarcely paying attention when this conversation was going on, but it came back to me on my (LONG) drive home, and it made me grumpy.  Why is it people seem so comfortable commenting on the eating habits of thin people?  Can you imagine the response of the room if the skinny girl had lifted her chin to one of the other biddies and said, 'Hey, check that out.  She ate TWO cookies!  That's why she's fat and I'm not." 

Now, I'm not gonna sit here and say it's equally offensive the other way, because I get it.  It's socially acceptable and desirable in America to be thin.  It is unacceptable and even offensive to be fat.  So maybe that's why people feel so comfortable calling out thin people on how they eat, because they're on the "acceptable" side of the spectrum.  And then skinny people feel they have to defend their unorthodox eating habits that they didn't put any thought into (except possibly "I'm no longer hungry" or "I don't want that") in order to assuage the wounded feelings and agitated egos of others who unknowingly watch their plates. 

But I have to tell you, it's uncomfortable!  And it is no less rude!  I wish I had been paying more attention and jumped in to save skinny girl.  But, maybe I was hiding, hoping the whole conversation would blow by me without any eyeball turning to me.  Maybe I didn't want to get involved.  Maybe I was having post-traumatic stress over a similar conversation about ham fat. 

Now that I've got that off my chest, I'm going to walk (not run) fat dog. 

Tuesday, October 23, 2012


There’s a bunker of regret that you’re defending
And there’s a trench in my soldier’s heart
Not only can I not imagine this ending, I can’t remember when it started
-Ron Hawkins

8 treadmill miles.  Over the past two days.  Today, I walked at incline 2.75 miles.  It was boring.  But yesterday was fascinating.  I ran 5.25 on the treadmill.  And as I predicted, my Navy Fit Test from a couple of weeks did not go unnoticed.  After I started running, an undercover representative from the Amish Army showed up.  How did I know he was undercover?   He didn't look Amish at all.  Clever.  How did I know he was from the Amish Army?  He was wearing a sweatshirt that said ARMY and sweatpants that said ARMY.  Could not have been more obvious.  Especially when he walked behind me to check out what I was doing on the treadmill.  Or to get a towel. 

Then, in comes a guy wearing a workout outfit - matching shirt and shorts.  He starts doing the most ridiculous series of stretches, including lifting one leg at a time over the handlebars of the stationary bike.  This isn't something anyone should do.  Anyway, he reminded me of Woody Harrleson's character in White Men Can't Jump.  I was pretty sure that the hustle was on - maybe he was going to fall of the treadmill and then challenge me to a running contest - with a bet to make it interesting.  But luckily, there were only two treadmills in the joint, and neither me nor the above-mentioned recruiter were leaving.

Until a guy comes in who proceeds to tell me his life story and how he is signing up for the Army tomorrow.  And that he lost 90 pounds in the last year.  And that he is the third fastest runner in the state.  And after his four years he is going to get married and then re-enlist.  Wait - how did you determine you were the third fastest runner in the state?  Nevermind - I didn't ask.  I didn't even get a word in edgewise.  It was odd.  The whole gym emptied in about 5 minutes.

Fatdog, fatdog
Alone in the world is a little fatdog
- Nickelodeon, Catdog

Sunday was inadvertently a 6 mile day. It would never be my intention to undertake such a foolhardy task. I did the mountain for 4 miles and ran about half of it. Then bf and I went shopping for some trail running shoes and we got these awesome matching Addidas shoes, his with orange accents and mine pink. So, we had to go try out the trails and I did another 2 and ran most of it this time while bf did 3. I was fatigued Monday! So I took the day off. Today I did 3.5 in the hood and then took the dog for another .75 or so wherein she dumped 3x and peed 5x but aside from that her ass was jogging! Back into shape for fatdog!

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Ya know Mo, I'll probably get ten years
So just give me beers til they get here
- Rehab, Sittin at a Bar

This is a really great song, and funny. I highly recommend it. Today I took far dog on my 3.5 mile hood route at around noon. It was warm and direct sunlight most of the way but I intended this to be a lazy run so I didnt mind the frequent potty stops. I was concerned, however, about the 3 times she just stopped and laid down in the shade. And the first was only mile in. I gotta whip this dog into shape.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Week in Review

Shield your eyes from the truth at hand
tell me why it'll be good again
all those demons are closing in
- Sara Bareilles, Bright Lights and Cityscapes

This was an odd week for running and a lazy week for blogging.  On Sunday, BF and I ran the mountain, about halfway up and all the way down.  4.5 total and it was a great workout.  So great that I didn't go at all on Monday.  Then Tuesday I did 3 in the hood.  Then Wed I did the mountain by myself, and there were helicopters circling the mountain.  I thought at first they must be warning me of upcoming danger on the trail, like a desert bear.  But then they hovered over a peak and dropped a guy out of the helicopter on a rope.  So I sat and watched for awhile, I think they were pulling someone off the mountain.  It was cool.  So I only did about 3.5 of the mountain on that day and I walked all the way down just cause I felt like it.  Then today BF and I had declared a FAF (fuck-around friday) and that entailed going to the gym after a big breakfast.  That is, I had a big breakfast - waffle, eggs, bacon.  He totally misordered a yogurt fruit parfait and then didn't eat it.  It was akin to me having prime rib while he picked at a dinner salad.  We went to the gym after that and I did 2 on treadmill at incline and then one on track with strength training.  It was a great workout, and we worked up a great appetite for popcorn and m&m's at the movie.  We saw Argo - great flick. 

Texas Breakfast

Thoughts that I had before
Don't come around anymore

I knew that I needed to run today.  Yesterday, I went to Waco.  I haven't been to Waco since 1993, when I went to do a project on the Branch Davidians.  A buddy and I drove up there with a video camera (like a giant one that could hold a VHS tape) and no plan, but knowing we had to put something together for our Texas Politics class.  On the way to Waco we saw a man riding a giant tricycle, and so we pulled over and interviewed him.  He too, was on his way to Waco, to mediate a settlement and then let the children ride out on his tricycle.  Right.  At least now we had a plan - let's talk to all the crazy people we see.  And we did.  When we presented our project, the only feedback we got from our professor was that our video was "too bouncy".  True enough.  A+.

Anyway, I went yesterday and on the way I stopped for breakfast.  I bought what can only be described as a "Texas breakfast".  A sausage, cheese, and jalapeno kolache and a dr. pepper.  I thought it was great until I looked at it - it's really just a hot dog wrapped in a slice of American cheese and baked in bread.  Then I thought "I really need to run:".  So I did today.  But only about 2.5 miles.  I ran through the neighborhood and saw someone else doing the snake run through the streets.  And when he saw me, he started running really fast, probably because he knew it was patent infringement.  Not cool.  I will have to get my neighborhood lawyer friend to stop doing yardwork and sue this guy.  So much to do.

Also need to keep building the playlist.  How about "Watch Me Try" from Sunriser.  This band is the coolest.  I usually put the link out there and tell you how great the song is, but this time I really mean it.  Follow it.  And then buy it on iTunes.  They need it.  And I'll know if you did - the song currently has 2 plays.  And one was mine.  Did I mention they need it?  How is a band this good a secret?  Oh right - the Canada thing.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Better Than Nirvana

But I took all the advice that I could take
Before I thought to give up
I bet you thought I'd give up
-Dead Sara

Today I ran during baseball practice.  OK - dropped off, got the forgotten water bottle from the car, drove to the gas station, drove home to change clothes, drove back, and then ran for about the last 15 minutes of practice.  Not great, but something.

Time for another addition to the playlist.  I remember way back when I first heard this song.  It must have been almost a month ago.  I heard it on the radio - the DJ was comparing Dead Sara to Nirvana.  And I thought "cool - this can be another band that I hate and everybody else likes".  Nope - exact opposite.  Normally, I try to listen to a song a million times before I give it the official endorsement.  But I'm going to make an exception.  This is cool.  And it's kinda fun to say "Dead Sara".  "We are what you say" is now official.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Another Solution

Sounds like bullshit, but did you ever notice
This whole town of ice and snow
Gets you running
Chasing something
What it is, I'll never know
-The Watchmen

I wasn't going to run today, but I had such a good time driving home from the football game with my family that I needed to.  So I ran just under 4.

So the NHL strike continues.  How about this - let's just sell ad space on the jerseys, use the extra money to bridge whatever gap exists and get back to work.  It sounds like the good players from all the other teams have signed to play in foreign countries, but nobody wants any of the Maple Leafs.  It is perfect.  Strike settled, Maple Leafs are good (by comparison), everybody (meaning me) is happy.  NHL - let me know where to send the bill.  Oh - and players association, you're paying too.  Nothing better than selling the same thing twice.  Consulting is easy.

Friday, October 12, 2012

High Tech

London calling and I don't wanna shout
But while we were talking I saw you runnin' out
-The Clash

Damn - technology is amazing.  I used to have a blackberry, which was nice becasue I could actually use it to type.  Now I have an iPhone which I run about 60% accuracy on hitting the correct key.  But my iPhone easily interfaces with my iTunes and so I can take it with me when I run.  And so today, in the middle of a song, it starts buzzing that I have a call.  And so I answered.  And kept running.  Amazing. 

Total run was a little over 5 miles.  Good stuff. 

They say that Galveston is the Montreal of Texas.  November 18th.
Man you wouldn't believe
The most amazing things
That can come from
Some terrible lies
- fun.

I just had a great run in my hood, 3.5 miles. It is crisp and cool outside and downright lovely. It rained and thundered all night and the streets were wet. I thought of my beautiful boy and how he's almost as tall as me now and how he might never have come to be had I known the lies being told back then. I got home and doused the neighbor dogs with water so I can sit outside and enjoy my yard. They were indignant and shocked and are now barking at me from inside the garage. Bastards. I have an ambien-filled hotdog waiting for you, my pretties. I had a run in with the neighbor this week over their noise and she seems to feel the ongoing dog harassment is acceptable as long as it doesn't occur before 7am. So I ordered this fancy device that supposedly will shoot them with high frequency screams akin to a fire truck every time they bark. But I think I enjoy the water torture more.

Thursday, October 11, 2012


Daddy can you hear
The devil's drawing near
- Miranda Lambert

First great news, I ran in a long sleeved shirt this morning, woot! I woke up and it was raining lightly and the thermostat read 68 degrees, so I pulled out my fav long sleeved running shirt. No, I didn't need it, but it was so nice to have the option. I did 3.5 in the hood cause I thought the mountain might be too slick. I always run by these piles of crap on the sidewalk filled with nuts and berries (not that i examine it too closely but it's obvious) and I'm simultaneously pissed at this dog owner who can't be bothered to pick up its shit off the sidewalk and sorry for the dog who has to eat such crappy food. But then I saw some of this same crap on the mountain the other day and it occurred to me that this must be javelina shit. Kinda cool and not just a little creepy that so many javelina roam my hood at night.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

I'm slipping again

Up to old tricks
Off my wagon
- Alannis Morisette

This is how I feel raising a 16 year old daughter. You make mistakes and they are never forgiven. I guess maybe that's women in general, haha. Yesterday I ran the mountain, about halfway up and halfway down. It was a tough 4.5 so today I did my 3.5 mile route today sans fat dog. I did take her for a half mile walk after, during which she pooped 4x and peed at least 5. This is why she doesn't get to go on the main run anymore.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Army of one

Slip back out of whack, at your best
It's a nightmare
So I'm joining the Army
-The Strokes

Yesterday, I ran on the treadmill and rode the stationary bike.  Today, I did the elliptical.  There was an option for the "Navy Fitness Test".  This test asked me to select my level - and of course I picked eleven.  But not like a Spinal Tap eleven, since it was out of 25, instead of 10.  Then I went for 12 minutes without any instruction or feedback.  At the end, it was just done.  No results, no nothing.  I'm assuming they normally release the results, but for some reason mine were classified.  Probably meant my score was outside the range they could score.  I'm sure I'll be getting a visit from a recruiter soon, but it won't work.  I'm sure I will fail their hearing test, because for about a month I thought the above lyric was "I'm joining the Amish".  Now, if the Amish army comes calling ...

Sunday, October 7, 2012


In a crooked little town, they were lost and never found
Fallen leaves, fallen leaves, fallen leaves... on the ground
-Billy Talent
Sunday run.  Finally feels like fall, after sweating out Friday's run in 85 degrees, today's run was in the 60's.  I ran about 4.5 and felt amazing in the last 1/2 mile.  I didn't feel amazing at any time prior to that, but it was nice to finish on a high note. 

On my run today, I was thinking about the new Texas license plates.  They are black and white with minimal decoration.  It makes me think of a major college football program where the head coach recently was fired due to his role in the cover up of a scandal, then died, then had his statue removed.  I don't want to name names, but I don't see why the state of Texas would want to align itself with this particular university.  But then I read the explanation - they say that black and white looks good with any color vehicle.  This also bothers me (not as much as the first part).  I'm guessing that all of the Texas A&M alumni who drive maroon cars (90 percent of all maroon cars are sold in Texas - I can't back that up, but it seems true) complained about their license plate clashing with their car. 

I think I just reopened my consulting business.  Texas - pick something different.  Let me know where to send the bill.

Friday, October 5, 2012

School Run

But for a moment
I'd like to forget
That my heart is
Sinking like a sunset
-Tom Cochrane

This afternoon I set off from my house and ran.  I had only a vague plan, which was to end up at my son's school to pick him up and the end of my run.  I ran a pretty good ways away from the school, which meant I had to run a good ways back.  Total was about 5.  And about a 1/2 mile walk home. 

It's time to add Sinking Like A Sunset by Tom Cochrane to the playlist.  It's funny how he is handled differently by radio on either side of the border.  In the US, they only play Life Is A Highway and occassionaly Lunatic Fringe.  In Canada, they never play Life Is A Highway, but you hear a Tom Cochrane song roughly every hour.  I like him a lot, but even if you don't, you have to admit that he is way better than Rush.  Or Glass Tiger.  Here's the link

Who do you think you are

Runnin round leavin scars
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all
- Christina Perri, Jar of Hearts

I blogged this morning from this vantage point on the mountain. Running has ban so good for my soul this week.

Wednesday, October 3, 2012


It reeks of politics
Signatures stained with tears
Who can remember, we've got to remember
-Midnight Oil

Did I really forget toothpaste and contact saline?  And did I really come up with the plan of running to the drugstore instead of just going to the gift shop?  Yes and yes.  And when the map showed three different Walgreens on one corner, not too far from my hotel, it seemed perfect.  Except for two things.  First - I am boycotting Walgreens for one year.  So no Walgreens for me (now read it again in your Soup Nazi voice).  Which is lucky because none of the three existed.  Or else they were hidden inside of the hospital that took up the whole block.  Either way, it wasn't happening.  So I ran farther and crossed under the highway to go to the CVS.  But it was gone too.  Turns out that I got turned around on my run and this was a different highway.  So I went to the gas station and bought toothpaste.  And a gatorade.  But not cucumber flavored.

All that nonsense for a run just over 3. 

Rewriting History

I just can't recover
how many years its been
its day one in my mind
its the first step each time
the heart is hard to find

all the fucked up things you say
couldn't possibly be
any less help to me
- Jimmy Eat World, Heart is Hard to Find

I had a lovely time on the mountain this morning and did four miles.  It was low 80's and sunny, so a little warm, but nice out.  I ran some up and some down.  I was in much better shape when I was doing the mountain regularly, so I'm happy the cooler weather is on its way. 

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

You could cut ties with all the lies

that you've been living in.
- Third Eye Blind, Jumper

Well, I didn't go on Friday.  I had to take my car into the shop yet again and didn't want to delay any further my road trip to Tucson.  As it turns out, I should have delayed, probably for the rest of my life.  But I digress.  Last night bf and I went to the gym and did the nerd workout, which entails running laps around the track with strength exercises every three laps.  I ran to the gym, which was about 1.5 miles and not too bad mi-80's temperatures.  Then I did a mile on the track.  My muscles were a little tight this morning cause I haven't done the nerd workout in awhile, but I went out and did 3 outside, and then walked another half with fat dog.  I haven't been taking her on my run because she has to stop every quarter mile to pee on something or poop, and I just can't take it.  I can't get into a rhythm.  But she is fat dog for a reason, so I've been walking her when I get home to get her some exercise.  Then I gave her and greasy cat both a bath, then I showered myself.  It's been a busy day.