And fuck what they're sayin

Gone are the days when the wind would brush my face
Gone are the days when you were the wind
And gone are the days when your heavy heart was worn on my sleeve
- The Head and the Heart, Gone

I went to yoga tonight after telling my blista sista how good it is for strength training only to have the first yoga teacher I didn't really like. I couldn't follow her and as a result didn't get a very good workout although I will say that my legs are sore. This girl after was laughing and saying it was almost sensual. Which was funny because the yoga mat I've been using has my ex bf's name on it and I was pondering earlier that I haven't felt the need to throw it out, which must mean I've reached some sort of peace with things. But lo and behold I spent the hour making love to his mat. It's not a very efficient workout but the ancillary benefit is learning to slow down. And really it makes exercise like relaxation, which is similar to running on the good days.

There were times you should have stopped
As you sailed into the fog
Like a dog, I smelled your fear
Lord knows you should have been here
But you were gone

Why should I care?

Don't be scared to walk alone
Don't be scared to like it
There's no time that you must be home
So sleep where your darkness falls
- John Mayer, Age of Worry

This is my new favorite song. I was correct on my theory that yoga would ease my problems. I discovered that the perfect workout is yoga and then running home from the gym. Also running to the gym, but that gets to be a pretty long workout. I ran 3.5 on Saturday, the whole way at 11:40 pace, which is better than I've done in awhile. And my ass didn't hurt before or after. Did same this evening but at 11:58 pace, still not bad although now my hip aches. So yoga tomorrow. I read today that yoga improves memory function. Bonus.

I stared up at the sun
Thought of all the people, places and things that I've loved
I stared up just to see
- One Republic, If I Lose Myself

I welcomed the new year largely from the couch today. I did get out for a freezing cold two miles around sunset once the outcome of the Oregon/Florida State game seemed clear. I spent some time thinking on the year. No earth shattering observations or revelations. Just a desire to be better. To let others be who they are.