Hear me now and don't forget
I'm not the man my actions would suggest
-The Afghan Whigs
I prepared for my run tonight by eating too much at dinner and then falling asleep during my son's bedtime routine. Coupled with the fact that I felt dehydrated before I started and I've been fighting off some sort off phlegm invasion, I was primed for a run. 3 miles of fun.
When I started my run tonight, I noticed that my shirt smelled. Not like sweat. Like a whole aerosol can of 1970s hairspray had been emptied into it. Also known as Tide "Fresh". I thought, no matter, it will only make me run faster. It didn't. It only made the run much more unpleasant. More on that later.
And by later I mean now. I wanted to stall a little bit to give the squeamish readers a chance to turn away. Because I made a major step towards becoming a real runner. Yes, I started to feel bad during my run. Yes, I did dry heave. Twice. No, I did not break my stride. And I'm sure that I looked very debonair in my stinky shirt, running and heaving. So why not. Debonair by The Afghan Whigs is in. Enjoy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJwWmz8Mp3U
I was ahead of my time. Instead of aerosol hairspray (Aquanet anyone?) I used the pump action White Rain. Which of course referred to the white hairspray dandruff that would rain down throughout the day. Also that stuff worked really well. It was at least once a week that I had to run the bottle under hot water because it had glued its revolutionary pump nozzle shut.
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