Army of one

Slip back out of whack, at your best
It's a nightmare
So I'm joining the Army
-The Strokes

Yesterday, I ran on the treadmill and rode the stationary bike.  Today, I did the elliptical.  There was an option for the "Navy Fitness Test".  This test asked me to select my level - and of course I picked eleven.  But not like a Spinal Tap eleven, since it was out of 25, instead of 10.  Then I went for 12 minutes without any instruction or feedback.  At the end, it was just done.  No results, no nothing.  I'm assuming they normally release the results, but for some reason mine were classified.  Probably meant my score was outside the range they could score.  I'm sure I'll be getting a visit from a recruiter soon, but it won't work.  I'm sure I will fail their hearing test, because for about a month I thought the above lyric was "I'm joining the Amish".  Now, if the Amish army comes calling ...