High

The world is a curse, it'll kill if you let it
I know they got pills that can help you forget it
- K.flay

Good song here. Did three this morning.

Day 4

This is Day 4 of my new job and the fourth morning run I've done this week. Only 2.5 today and yesterday because I have to be back by 7 and try to leave by 730 to get to work by 8 for a daily 8am leadership call which will for sure be and already is the bane of my existence. I can do the call from the car which in reality is what I've been doing. But I'm pretty happy with my commitment level. So many positive things line up when I run in the morning. I eat better all day, I'm energized and alert when I get to work and I can spend my evenings relaxing.

I set out running but I take my time
A friend of the devil is a friend of mine
If I get home before daylight
I just might make it to work on time
- Mumford remake

I was late to my first day of work yesterday so I cut my run short this morning - 3 miles. Also I had to poop.

Desert blooms

I'm not sure if the desert gets more beautiful every year or if I'm just better at noticing. But look at this amazing tree/plant thingy! Right there on my run. It's so pretty here with all the blooming colors. I'm off work entirely this week as I decompress and recompress my brain into a good space. I start my new job in Monday! So I've been good about running every morning and did a 5.5 mile hike up to Toms Thumb on Sunday. Ive been spending mornings drinking iced tea at AJs and studying up on healthcare policy and also reading books and otherwise goofing off.

Victory

Today was truly a victory. I was up several times during the night because my neighbors car alarm kept going off and I kept thinking it was mine and that someone was trying to break in. Not a good night. Nevertheless, I persisted. Several times I decided to blow off the run and go back to sleep but when it mattered I actually got out of bed. I hit the road a full 30 minutes late but that doesn't really matter since I don't really have to be anywhere. So chalk one up for self discipline people!!! Also I'm listening to The Handmaids Tale which is all the buzz lately and it's quite creepy.

I think I'll be alone until I die
Lay here on my back and watch the sky
The stars look awfully nice out but I'm cold
I guess I should have taken her advice
- THATH

What a gorgeous morning out and Lordy I love this band. If all goes well I will see them five times this year which is certainly a record of some sort. I'm on a little high this morning. It is a beautiful thing when kids make decisions you know are right for them but you allow them the freedom to to carve their own path and they arrive at the same place as you.

She thinks you love the beach
You're such a damn liar
- Lorde, Green Light

I love this song. So dark. I had a godawful attempt at a run this morning but yesterday went fairly well. It's been tough getting up this week, maybe due to my mini bday vacay.

If I ever get around to living

It's gonna be just like I dreamed
I'm gonna take the love I'm given
And set it free
- John Mayer

I woke up this morning joyously back to feeling well. Until I went running and I thought my lungs would explode. But it's a beautiful morning out and I'm enjoying iced tea on the patio at AJs. I'm taking a long weekend to celebrate the anniversary of my birth and new beginnings.

Proud of me

It takes 30 days to form a habit, so they say. This is my fourth consecutive week of getting up at 6am to run. Granted I only got Mon and Tues last week due to a Tuesday night celebration that threw off the rest of the week (though I did go on Friday). This week I also got Mon and Tues and am now couch-ridden with the most horrific sinus cold that will most likely have me laid out tomorrow as well.

The jake factor

Cause when you're done with this world
You know the rest is up to you
- John Mayer, Walt Grace's Submarine Test

This is one of the more obscure John Mayer songs and one of my favorites. This old dude needs a change and adventure so he builds a one man fan blade powered submarine and sails to Japan and all his friends are amazed and they name their bar after him. It's kinda where I am in life. Major changes on the horizon that make me tremble if I think too deeply on them. But I may well be off on a new adventure of my own. A change of life, a change of scenery, a changing of the seasons. So this the third week of my 6am adventures, I got a bit of a late start as getting out of bed proved challenging. So I was a few minutes behind and ran most of the last mile just because I wanted to get home before he left. Seeing his little smile as he's off to his day just brightens my morning. I miss him already.