This is dedicated to my boss

Tiny curtains open
And we heard the tiny clap of little hands
A tiny man would tell a little joke
And get a tiny laugh from all the folks

- Modest Mouse - Missed The Boat

Dedicated to the little man in little jeans who left me eating lunch alone so he could take his little call. This song made me laugh yesterday when it reminded me of him. He's totally missing the boat. I did 3.5 around the neighborhood yesterday and the first half went well, I made it to the top of the very long hill without stopping. But the way back I was spent and took some walk breaks and walked most of the last mile. It was warm, like 80, before I got out but still. Now I'm in Starbucks eating pumpkin bread. So you can see how all that is working!  Although I have been very good about getting more protein. I registered for a shamrock run in old town this evening so hopefully that will be more fun than yoga. I will probably get my yoga in at the losers club tomorrow. 

Wherein banana bread was declared the root of all evil

So, I had my annual "wellness" visit last week. It did not go well. I weighed more than I have in years, and my triglycerides are twice what they were last year. I've always struggled with the triglycerides, because I have a sweet tooth and I eat like shit. And the older I get, the less the exercise bails me out. I do blame the yoga, however, for my current predicament. This grunting sweating class makes me absolutely ravenously hungry all the time. And I pretty much always feel like I can treat myself, because I just worked out. My weekly treat of pumpkin bread or a doughnut for breakfast has become a daily habit for the last couple months. And when you start the day that way, the rest goes to hell. So I was sharing this grievance with my doctor and she asked me what I eat after I work out. Head bowed, face burning with shame, I muttered "banana bread". She laughed in surprise and then proceeded to tell me that that is the absolute worst thing I could possibly eat after muscle building exercise, and that I need to have a high protein meal and if I do eat carbs they must be complex carbs. So. Sigh. I know I need to do better. I'm a lazy eater. Cooking for one sucks, and I never know when the boy will be home. So dinner has been fast food or nachos or pasta. So anyway, I'm committed to eating better. I actually packed my lunch for work Friday and today. And this was my dinner tonight. As for running - I'm on schedule. Did the mountain yesterday, yoga and two miles tonight.

Body Flow then three miles, it's been a good week and I'm killing it in March so far. 

Something I noticed, I was having a lot of this really weird foot pain. Like shooting pain in my foot that would sometimes cause me to have to stop running and walk until it would pass. I have no idea what it is, but I've noticed I don't get it anymore since I started with the yoga/body flow. So I'm wondering if it was an ankle strength thing or something.  Good stuff, though. 

Look Her Right In The Eye

All's well at the base of the hill

You might need to fill

A prescription to kill

Off the silence.

     - Joshua Radin

A beautiful little song called "Star Mile" that Sandy gave me a long time ago and which never fails to make me cry. So naturally I listened to it right before my body flow class, because that's a great and smart move and what could go wrong? (Incidentally, Sandy seems to have a habit of recommending songs that routinely reduce me to tears, and what the fuck is up with that?)

Anyway, good four miles, good class, good hot tub. Just another evening with the Friday Night Loser's Club. 

Illusions

"Some people have remarkably sturdy illusions."
- Dave Calhoun, Mr. Yummy (Stephen King, Bazaar of Bad Dreams)

No inspired song tonight, but this quote really spoke to me as I was reading last night. I am one of those people. It's takes a very long time for my illusions to die, even when I am standing over them violently squeezing the life out of them. I went up north this week for spring break and had the luxury of a woodland view while I worked and my boy and his homies went snowboarding. I had to deal with ghosts even there, in my happy place, which is regrettable. But it is still my happy place and today I did 3 miles around the lake. It was a lovely illusion. But really I did go. Didn't I?

Take This Sinking Boat And Point It Home

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You'll make it now

       -Glen Hansard "Falling Slowly"

This song played in my body flow class Sunday and tonight. I originally heard it when it was featured in this very obscure movie called "Once" that Christa and I watched together on some trip I made to Boston. The movie wasn't much to remember, but I still remember this song. It's a good one. 

Anyhoodle, I ran two miles and then did body flow. I wasn't that into it, couldn't get the flow, as it were and then during the stupid meditation thing I started crying, so that's a new adventure. 

I used to cry all the time at the gym, that used to be a pretty common occurrence. Now of course I save my crying for plane take-offs. 

So I went to run another two after the class but quickly realized I wasn't quite up to it, said fuck it, and got in the hot tub. Which is where I still be. 

Read more:  Glen Hansard - Falling Slowly Lyrics | MetroLyrics 

I'm too tired to come up with a clever title or song. I did body flow and ran four miles and the soaked in the hot tub until I was a wrinkled prune. 

I may have overstretched my bum hip, not sure yet. I had a bad moment in body flow, the instructor put out a bunch of flameless tea light candles, and I was worried about having some kind of ridiculous advice said, but it turned out she was just suggesting using them as a focal point for the balance poses (which I'm pretty good at). 

Anyway, I did 16 miles this week and three strength classes and I'm tired. Tomorrow is a rest day. 

Why why why

You're just saying goodbye
to people whose every word is just a lie
And you wonder just a little if your soul isn't starting to die
And you spend every waking moment wondering why
- Airborne Toxic Event

And so this was the song on repeat this evening. It's funny how different music speaks to you at different times. Always a solace. Today's run almost didn't happen - I spent the greater part of the day sawing and hauling branches from my neighbors tree. It's a charitable act I do once a year or so so as to avoid having to politely request that she keep her goddam trees from invading my yard and clogging my pool filter. So needless to say I was tired and it was quite a workout in itself. But it was such a beautiful evening that I wanted to get out and do what I could. This resulted in a surprisingly enjoyable run and I actually did 3.5, so a good start to the week.

Work

You took my heart and my keys and my patience
You took my heart on my sleeve for decoration
You mistaken my love I brought for you for foundation
Rihanna - Work 

A couple of firsts happened in yoga today. I heard this song for the first time and it was awesome!  I just bought it for my workout playlist. Yoga is work, after all. Also, this chick let a GIANT FART in class while lying on her back with her ass pointed directly at me. I was horrified and desperately hoping none of it got on me. And still nobody in class reacted. Maybe I'm just the only immature person in the world who does yoga. Yeah, that's probably it. I went to a movie so ended up with only time to do a mile before class, which was fine because it was a tough class and I did fairly well. And that's 14 for the week. I don't think I blogged my 3 miles on Thurs. It was uninspired. Now I'm gonna shower up and go drink some well earned wine. 

In Which I Might MIGHT Stop Bitching About Yoga

How many rules am I  to break before you understand 

That your double standards don't mean shit to me?

I know exactly what you say 

When I turn and walk away

But that's okay

Cuz' I don't let it get to me

              -Salt N Pepa

Goddamn, with the awesome Salt N Pepa!! Some throw back to my high school days. 

So, a while back when I first joined my new gym with the classes, my goal was to try some classes. Which I did. And one of the classes I did was called Body Flow. I always sort of thought about it as yoga without the bullshit and with better music (OMG SO MUCH BETTER MUSIC YOU GUYS). I did a few classes and then they got rid of a bunch of them and none worked for me anymore, and I wasn't committed to classes and they generally aren't my thing so I let it go. 

So after Wednesday's yoga class, and the what shall forevermore be known as the Right Nostril Incident, I saw that now that I have the fancy gym membership and can go to other branches, there is one with a 5:30 Body Flow class on Friday nights. 

And y'all. I LOVED this class. So so much. I got that "wrung out" feeling that sandy is always yammering on about and that I'm pretty sure you are supposed to have after these types of classes, but that for whatever reason I have an absurdly hard time achieving. It was awesome. I have found my class, and it does not involve telling me I overeat when I breathe through the incorrect nostril. 

I still like my Sunday yoga class, but from here on out, everything else is Body Flow, and I'm still counting it as Yoga, since it pretty much is. 

Anyway, also I ran four miles. BECAUSE I AM THE UNSTOPPABLE BEAST. (Who also has nothing better to do on Friday nights.)