Wine and ice cream sandwiches

That's what I'm doing this Saturday night as I watch the correspondents dinner. That's the kind of nerd I am. I sent my boy off to prom not the least bit impressed with his date. I only hope he comes home in one piece. I may not survive until he goes off to college. Or he may not. I did the mountain today. 4.5 miles. It was tough. And slow. But I ran some goddammit. Then I went to my class at asu and was too late to get in so I came home. Last night I went to hh after class and was quite impressed with myself as I'd rather have gone home and stabbed myself in the eyeball. But I did meet some nice people. And then also I ran 3.5 miles which was the most impressive at 9pm. And Barack is not nearly as funny as I hoped tonight. And I did hope he would at least take his shirt off. Is that sexist? Meh. No songs that I can even remember from my run today. But I got 47 miles for the month and 3 strength training. Not a great month. But I have many excuses. I turned 46 after all. Thank god I still look like I'm in my 30's. Peace. Out.


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Sick and Tired

This here is the view from my favorite treadmill at the gym. You can't tell very well from this picture, but it was snowing again. I took this pic yesterday, and it's a view I'm getting way too familiar with because it just won't stop snowing. I can't even remember the last time I ran outside. 

Anyway, I also did 60 floors on TMST and a body flow class, but I am getting sick. My chest is all tight and hurty and now I'm coughing. So I skipped today and not sure about tomorrow either. But it turns out I ran more than I thought in April, so I'm well over pace for my 1000k mileage goal. I'm at 381k, so I should be okay I think. 

Every promise don't work out that way

Dishes smashed on the counter
From our last encounter
Pictures snatched out the frame
Bitch I scratched out your name
Oh and your face
- Bey

My promise ain't workin out that way this month. I accidentally went to happy hour yesterday instead of running. Tues I was in San Fran. So today I did a 3.5 mile run in the gorgeous sunshine and breeze. I felt so good I decided I would also run to yoga. But then I got tired and that didn't happen. So I need 11 miles by Saturday. As I said, every promise don't work out that way.

Shoot

My daddy warned me about me like you
He said said baby girl he's playing you
When trouble comes to town and like me come around
My daddy said shoot
- Sandy

Much has been made in the press about Bey's new release and today I downloaded this fun little ditty that's unlike anything she's done before. A little country. Love it. Today I did 3.5 around the hood in the beautiful breezy evening. I even wore a light jacket!! I did some walking and hiking with my girls over the weekend but nothing that counts so I'm gonna be short this month. I still need 15.5 miles by Friday!!!

Got a whole lotta reasons to be mad, let's not pick one

There ain't nobody here who can cause me pain or raise my fear
Cause I got only love to share
If you're looking for truth I'm proof you'll find it there

      -Avett Brothers

This is a fun little ditty that I put on my playlist this week. That line about a lot of reasons to be mad makes me laugh. No need to pick just one, people!

So after Friday's exertions, we went for a ten mile hike with our hiking club. It was the first hike of the season and it really didn't seem that difficult but I was really sore after. Meanwhile, Chris is all "I'm a little sore, but nothing bad" and for me getting on and off the toilet is now a chore. That bastard, he's always been a stronger hiker than me. I take solace in the fact that he gets injured every time he runs more than two or three miles. 

Anyway, so instead of being a normal human being and resting after a ten mile hike, I instead followed it up on Sunday with a three mile run, 60 floors on the stairs, and a body flow class. Then we walked around Costco and the grocery store because we have two teenagers in the house and it turns out keeping them fed is a real damn chore!

So today, I rest. 

What would you give?

Are you on fire

From the years

      - Indigo Girls (with Michael Stipe)

Fun fact, in the not-so-distant past, I spent an entire summer laying by the pool and crying while listening to this song on repeat. Good times. 

I did three miles (annoyingly interrupted by poop, but done nevertheless), 40 floors on what my friend Christa and I have begun referring to "that murdery stair thing" (TMST for short), then body flow. 

Crazy

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called life.
Electric word life, it means forever and that's a mighty long time but I'm here to tell ya!
There's something else. The afterworld.
- Prince

Rest in Peace, mighty one. I did the nerd workout at the gym today because I couldn't fit yoga in and I have a dinner date with my babies. So two miles with strength training every five laps. I got the general areas that yoga does but no stretching and not nearly as beneficial, but you gotta do what works.

She says, "Where are we going?"
And he, he looks at her and he says, "We're going to a party
It's a birthday party, it's your birthday party, happy birthday darling
We love you very, very, very, very, very, very, very much"
Bright Eyes - At The Bottom Of Everything 

So I ran yesterday and today, 3.5 miles around the hood. Some walk breaks, especially in that last mile. I can feel that I'm slower with these few extra pounds. But that doesn't really matter. It never has. What matters is that I keep going. And I'm making progress towards my goal. 12 miles and a yoga class so far this week. Goal is to his yoga and 2 miles tomorrow and than Sat is a freebie - good if I go but fine if I don't. I'll be heading up north for a bday weekend with girlfriends. I feel so good about this birthday, not sure why. I'm feeling happy and confident and at peace. 

So I will find my fears and face them
Or I will cower like a dog
- Bright Eyes, Another Travelin Song

So I did 2 miles before yoga tonight. It was a good class and I did well - I totally floated my half moon on both sides (make of that what you will). I had some good insights too. I decided to focus on forgiveness. It occurred to me whilst floating that you can't really hold anger against a drowning man who pulled you under while trying to save himself. Or a boy lost in the woods who, while clinging to your leg, prevented you from finding the way out. In that case I can be grateful I made it back out of the ocean, and also sleep peacefully knowing the drowning man is surrounded by life savers, there for the grabbing, and the boy has a map in his pocket if only he will dig for it. We can all save ourselves. We cannot save each other. So in that way, from that perspective, forgiveness is an easy decision - both for myself and the drowning man. More easily said than done, but a good perspective nevertheless. On another note, I accidentally ate three dinner rolls before yoga (these delicious and addicting rolls from Costco). So I decided to just have a protein bar after. But that didn't last long so I also had a little turkey sandwich on said delicious rolls. At least I'm getting protein in addition to my empty carbs.

I hope that it gets to you
I hope that you see this through
- Rihanna

Today was the first day in a long time that I haven't had anything to do. So what did I do? Lots of nothings. I took two naps. I caught up in all my murder mystery shows. I made brownies. I fixed the dog door. I trimmed my plants. I cleaned my pool and kitchen. And at long last, I got out for a run after six. I brought fat dog which guaranteed an inconsistent pace. And the brownies guaranteed a pit stop. Not my best effort for sure. But there was a gentle breeze blowing and I got 3 miles done. I did some math and realized I'm going to have to do 16 miles this week and next in order to hit goal this month. So we shall see about that. I did not get out for a run or yoga yesterday.

Stark Choices

Well now the ocean speaks and spits and I can hear it from the interstate
And I'm screaming at my sister on a cell phone she is far away
And I'm saying nothing in the past or future ever will feel like today
Until we're parking in an alley
Just hoping that our shit is safe

      - Bright Eyes (with pronoun liberties)

A song I never get tired of listening to or quoting. 

The choice today was stark, people. Chris and I made the brilliant decision yesterday to spend an hour or so working out hard at the gym, and then went to the grocery store ravenously hungry. Where we proceeded to buy, among other assorted shit, a bag of chocolate chips, so I could make cookies. 

Today we ended up with about 14 inches of snow, and my plan was to just stay home and bake cookies and read. But then morning turned into afternoon and all I wanted to do really was go to the damn gym (Chris went snow shoeing for three miles and then shoveled all the snow, he wasn't interested). So I could either make the cookies or struggle through the snow to the gym. Both things were for sure not getting done. 

I did the gym. Getting there wasn't as bad as all that. I did three miles and then 60 floors on that stair thing. 

Anyway, in stupid news, I joined weight watchers. So. Stupid. I have literally done nothing but make fun of Oprah for going in on this absurd diet. 

But people. I need some help. Not with weight loss, I like my weight fine. (Okay so sue me, I wouldn't MIND losing a few more, whatever shut up.) I need help with my diet. 

I work out a lot (as you may have noticed)    And all that working out allows me to fit in a shocking amount of sugar into my diet without gaining weight, and since I'm perfectly happy with my weight, there hasn't been anything stopping me. 

But six months ago, my a1c was up a LOT and I was put on metformin and while not officially diagnosed with diabetes, I may as well be. 

So at first I was just pissed off (my first reaction to any given situation, as those who know me will attest). So I spent some time yelling at nurses and dietitians. The I went on the medication and have since went through a period of supreme indifference. 

At no point has my diet changed and I still consume way more sugar than someone with my issue should (which is none, just by the way). 

Anyhoodle... So I have some friends doing weight watchers and I thought maybe if I had some structure to my diet? And I think counting calories is a bad idea for me at this point, I need to actually differentiate between foods and calories, because my focus has to be on avoiding the goddamn sugar which is the bane of my existence (also my greatest friend, best comfort, celebration, and all around good time). 

Anyway.... I'm sorry Oprah. I won't make fun of it anymore. 

Born to lose

Love is for the fighter
Born to lose but never quit
Swingin for the moon in the water
- Dawes, moon in the water

This is a sweet little ditty I heard tonight on my run. Yes, the third run on this trip. I've worn the same running clothes for three days in a row now and I will say I smelled ripe before I even set out tonight. But I'm back on track. I think striving for fitness is like swinging for the moon in the water. I'm never there. But I keep swinging. So I've got 11.5 miles for the week. If I hit yoga and a short run on Sat I will be very pleased.

Blah

I want a little bit of everything

The biscuits and the beans

Whatever helps me to forget about

The things that brought me to my knees

So pile on those mashed potatoes

And an extra chicken wing

I'm having a little bit of everything

     - Dawes

For my sister, who is struggling with her running and her weight. Sometimes things bring you to your knees. Sometimes pumpkin bread helps. Sometimes it's okay to let the pie love you back. 

I did three miles, then 40 floors on that whatever stair machine. I did not want to do Body Flow. I did not want to breathe, I did not want to stretch. I did not want to find my center, I did not wish to assume warrior poses. 

I did not want to do it here, or there. I did not want to do it anywhere. But I did. 

Confidence restored

So you run
Throw knives in the dark
I saw you late last night come to harm
I saw you dance in the Devil's arms
- Mumford

I left work early today after suffering being told my boobs look huge this morning. I felt fat and self conscious all day and admittedly my skirt was tight from a few extra pounds. So I left and went for a long run before dinner tonight. I did four miles outside and it felt really great. Confidence restored. What's with the boobs and calves in this family?? Anyhoodle, I refuse to refrain from free alcohol this evening as I need to drink to make these people interesting. But I shall limit myself to expensive and low calorie vodka. And maybe an olive or two for protein.

Thank goddess for Rachel Maddow

Alternate title: I blame the treadmill

I will hold on hope
And I won't let you choke
On that noose around your neck
- Mumford and Sons

So I did go to the hotel gym tonight. And it was absolutely freaking miserable. My lungs couldn't get air. I couldn't tolerate my inclines. I felt fat in my workout clothes. There was a very handsome man in the gym also running. I gave in after a mile and walked and ran again and had decided to give up entirely at 1.5 miles but by then I was engrossed in Rachel's story on past republican conventions. So god bless her I stayed on and ran/walked another half mile. That's a grand total of two today, people. But alas, tomorrow is another day. And, at least I went.

Way less

Sorry if I'm way less friendly
I got niggas tryna end me
- Rihanna/Drake, Work

So I actually did get to the gym once at my hotel over the weekend and ran 3 on treadmill. It was pretty miserable for the first half mile but then I got into a groove. I can't remember the last time I ran on a treadmill but I guess I better get used to it. Moms house was a bust after my heat stroke run. So it hasn't quite been an illustrious start to the month. I did go to yoga last night and ran two so that was good. The plan was to go this morning at 8 but of course that didn't work out for a variety of reasons. So now I'm on a plane again headed to Georgia. My plan B is to go tonight at the hotel when I get there around 9. So we'll see how that goes.

Who's That Bitch?

People, you know. 

       - Missy Elliot

Today I ran three (in addition to 5 yesterday and 4 on Thursday which were unremarkable) and also did 20 minutes on this machine. 

What is this machine called? I want to call it a stair stepper, but for me (because I am old) a "stair stepper" conjures up a specific machine and it isn't this machine. 

Anyway, I did 20 minutes and 59 floors of stairs and sweated like I've never sweated before! I could see myself getting hooked on this machine, it was hard work! I'm hoping to be a little more prepared for hiking this year. It turns out that running isn't actually great preparation for hiking. You can run miles and miles and think you are the shit and in great shape, and those goddamn Colorado mountains will kick your ass just for spite. I'm thinking this machine is good training for hiking, but I suppose we shall have to find out by actually doing it. 

Low

How'd you get so

How'd you get so low? 

Baby, I don't know 

Could it be that hard?
Never mind the rent and you quit your job
Flying, at what cost?
Shout out to the ones we've lost

- Better Than Ezra - Rolling

This is a swanky little bluesy tune that just makes me want to swing my arse.  No energy for swingin today, however. I did get out for a run today in the old pueblo. And it was damn hot at 1pm. I waited too long. It was a torturous 84 degrees and the sun was brutal beating down. I got 3.5 but it wasn't pretty. Now I'm sitting in front of Safeway downing my tea so I can go get a refill before heading back to the motherland. It's gonna be awhile before I can do some yoga due to travel and such. Maybe I can get one in on Thursday before my flight.